The Prime Minister One-Term Tony today explained that the Navy had been playing cricket when their boat repeatedly strayed over the boundary into Indonesia.
“We have awarded Indonesia 30 runs, on the ‘over the fence is 6 and out’ rule”, One-Term explained.
“Because we did it five times“, he added. “It’s a good thing we weren’t playing tippy-go-run, ha ha ha”.
When asked why the wicket-keeper, who drives the boat when not fielding, dropped five catches in a row, One-Term replied “Apparently at the time he was texting a Facebook status (pictured), and was distracted.”
“We are amending the rules to prohibit texting while playing “.
“Let me give you an analogy”, he continued, “a display of overwhelming armed force to coerce unarmed seasick civilians, including women and children, up to and right over another country’s sovereign border, is a lot like playing cricket. Sometimes, unfortunately, a seagull is killed.”
One-Term was asked why the Navy chose to play cricket so close to the Indonesian boundary that fours or even sixes were highly likely.
He replied “We don’t comment on operational matters during a match. This is war, you know, with elite athletes, on water, with tides and wind and cricket balls.”
There were no further questions.