Excerpted from my article Prime Minister “One-term” Tony sets a blistering pace, about One-term Tony’s achievements in only 70 days.
Science: For the first time since 1931 Australia lacks a Minister for Science. [but for late breaking news, see Australia’s new Science Minister 2014-01-07]
One-term Tony clearly understands that scientists have caused many of Australia’s and particularly the government’s problems, and in addition to abolishing the ministry he has also effectively cut 25% of CSIRO, a bunch of trouble makers who invent things like over-the-horizon radar, wi-fi, gene shears, polymer banknotes, and other nonsense of no value to Australia.
“Just because Science, ah, worked in the, um 1930s doesn’t mean that it, um, works, er, now; that’s only, er, common sense”, he was reported to say. “There’s clearly a, um, climate for change, and by that, er, I obviously mean there’s, um, no climate change”.
Climate Change: Having eliminated scientists, One-term turned to internationally respected sources such as Wikipedia and Christopher Monckton for climate policy, and freed up valuable funding for important portfolios like Immigration and Education by immediately abolishing the obviously unnecessary Climate Commission and Clean Energy Finance Commission.
He also made good on his promise to immediately and urgently abolish the Carbon Tax by renewing his promise to immediately and urgently abolish the Carbon Tax, and promising to keep urgently renewing his promise until immediately in July next year or until some totally unexpected good reason urgently stopped him from immediately renewing it before or after then.